Are we all victims of DOUBLE STANDARDS!

I have had several requests to write a post discussing DOUBLE STANDARDS. I thought it was quite interesting that these requests came from my male friends! not a word from the females.

The official definition of a  DOUBLE STANDARD - Any code of principles containing different provisions for one group of people than for another, especially an unwritten code of sexual behaviour permitting men more freedom than women. (Dictionary.com)

I find it funny that the official definition depicts woman as the primary victims. Men have created one set of rules for themselves that women are not allowed to follow, yes, this is true. For instance men congratulate each other on having several sexual partners but will frown upon women that behave the same way. This is a massive double standard but it is one that have been embroided soo deeply into society it has become popular belief and practise. This is emphasised by the fact that women somewhat empose these double standards on each other as they will frown upon their fellow females for increased promiscuity  I personally believe that men and women ARE equal but they ARE NOT the same. Women also have double standards . When a man is well groomed, fashionable and looks after themselves women are the first to question their sexuality. Again this double standard has become a societal norm and is also accepted and adopted by men.


LETS DELVE DEEPER INTO THE WORLD OF THE DOUBLE STANDARD

When i was asked to discuss this topic, my friends were not thinking about the unwritten codes of sexual behaviour giving men more freedom. The tag line for this blog is, " A blog written by a young adult for young adults...." and for us young adults double standards go deeper. We are all different and have probably been affected by double standards in different ways. I can only speak about my experiences and what I have seen. In my mind these two types of double standard dominate our lives:


1) Giving advice to friends that they would not themselves follow


2) Expecting more from a sexual partner than you are willing to give.

DOUBLE STANDARDS & ADVICE

This form of double standard has killed many a relationship! Do not get me wrong this does not only apply to relationships, but is particularly damaging when exercised in a relationship. I am sure we have all been there; seeking relationship advice from friends and receiving a barage of advice that your friends would not  follow if they were in your situation. STOP LISTENING!!! to these double standards!!!! you will end up miserable. People do not realise that they are feeding you massive portions of double standard. The problem is that in giving advice to our friends, we tend not to consider the individual differences and feelings in a situation. Double standards are the cousin of societal norms. We tend to advise friends on what we believe is right in society rather than what is really right for them. Next time you are in relationship pickle, yes, ask for an opinion but the final decision should always be yours! Without sounding soppy follow your heart and do what feels right! If you are going to give advice, try your best to think about the indiviual and what they really want not just what is right by society.

THE SINGLETONS DOUBLE STANDARD

People please forgive me if I am, "Hotting up the game" but many men will say, "I am single so I am going to see loads of girls but none of these girls are allowed to see anyone else." huh!...... what!....... how about that for a double standard!. Yet this is so common amongst single men especially. You expect a woman to commit to you but you refuse to make a similar commitment because you are single. To make it even worse  many men actually get annoyed when a woman demands a similar commitment. You know something is wrong when you have to lie about it and this is exactly what men do. They will make that woman feel like she is the only one and will create all sorts of other excuses as to why we cannot fully commit.

I no longer want to hear men complain  about their partners friends intervening in their relationship if they partake in the singletons double standard. Ladies, I am far from a love guru so please refrain from contacting me asking for the tell tale signs of the singletons double standard, I will not be able to help you! 

I think double standards are cyclical. Imposing double standards as singletons normally results in us being victims of double standards of the friendly advice variety. I say we all adopt a W.G..I state of mind and attempt to create a world in which the double standard ceases to exist!